PostHeaderIcon What do you really, really want?

Health and Fitness

072812_danya_girl

By Danya Keeley

“A human being is a deciding being.” - Viktor E. Frankl

Have you ever sat down to brainstorm the question ‘What do I want?’ only to find your brain has instantly come up with 50 or so things you don’t want? Well, you are not alone. The tendency for us all to dwell on the areas of our lives which we don't like or want is common.  However the question still remains, ‘What do you truly want?’

(Original artwork by Danya Keeley)

“Be curious, not judgmental.”  - Walt Whitman

The answer, paradoxically, is actually found amongst your ‘don’t wants’! Yes, all those negative responses, which have spewed out of your mouth, hold the secret to clarifying what you truly want.

Consequently, your ‘don’t wants’ or 'don't likes' are almost always the opposite of what you want; therefore looking at what you don’t want becomes a tool for discovering what you do want!

“You uncover what is--when you get rid of what isn't.” - R. Buckminster Fuller

Recognizing that your negative statements are a steppingstone to uncovering what you really want alleviates the feeling that you are stuck; the belief that you can not find a viable answer to the original question is eliminated.

Once you start examining your don’t wants, what you do want becomes less illusive.

For example, if you said, “I don’t want a dead end job without any room for advancement!” The opposite desire might be, “I want a job with greater challenge and lots of opportunity for financial and professional growth!” or you may say: “I don’t like being 30 pounds overweight: none of my clothes fit me.” The positive contrasting statement would be, “I want to attain my healthy ideal weight and feel good in the clothes I wear!”

Knowing what you want is important because all the areas of your life where you’ve rehearsed over and over what you don't want or don't like has systematically produced a life YOU DON’T WANT.

“Ever more people today have the means to live-- but no meaning to live for.”

- Viktor E. Frankl

So asking yourself the question, ‘What do I truly want?’ is the first step toward getting out of a habitual cycle of ending up disappointed, discouraged and feeling defeated before you start.

“People should think things out fresh and not just accept conventional terms and the conventional way of doing things.”

- R. Buckminster Fuller

Clarifying what you want creates a positive direction, fosters hope, engages inspiration, aligns you with your deeper truth, etc. Instantly you have a goal, a dream, a destination; a proverbial spot on your map where you can start planning your incremental steps toward achieving your desires.

You can’t get what you want if you don't know what it is! Therefore, if the life you've created is clearly not working for you—it is essential you make time to answer the question ‘What do I really want?’

“Oh while I live, to be the ruler of life, not a slave, to meet life as a powerful conqueror, and nothing exterior to me will ever take command of me.”

- Walt Whitman

Remember it is in you to succeed!

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