Bikini Boy and Helium Girl in one episode

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American Idol Season 9

Wednesday, 03 February 2010 00:13 |

Arts & Entertainment

By Rose Wade

This week started out in Denver Colorado, with guest judge Victoria Beckham. First up was Mark Lariola from Denver, he said he gets told 3 times a week he looks like Jack Black and that he had a sordid background after being on the run with his mom from his dad for many years as a kid. He sang "Tempted" and got the first gold ticket of the day.

Mario "queasy little laugh" Galvan sang Elvis's "Jailhouse Rock", did not get a gold ticket, but parted on a positive note about there always being next year (insert queasy little laugh here). Hopefully he gets control of that nervous laugh before next year's audition's, or he is likely to be laughed out on his ear again.

(Photo: Click to watch Austin Paul's arrogant audition on YouTube.)

They showed a rash of clips of contestants reacting poorly to being turned away, one guy going so far as to hit the camera several times. I found this segment completely annoying, as we didn't get to see their performances to understand or justify the hissy fits. I was yawning and stretching before the end of the segment, so can't tell you how it ended.

Next up was single mom, Kimberly Kerbow, who sang "The way I am", starting in the middle of the song and customized the lyrics to include "I would bye him Rogaine if he ever needed it". She got the OK from all 4 judges, though Simon, not at all impressed with the Rogaine comment, shot her a parting blow that she should go torture her ex and now she knew why he was an ex.

Danelle Hayes lives in Seattle, hosts live karaoke and plays in a cover band. She sang "I'm the only one" by Melissa Etheridge, Randy said she had a great voice and Victoria said she was going to go a long way. I felt that she seemed genuine and had a smokey quality to her voice that usually propels these contestants along to the finals.

Casey James from Fort Worth had been in a motorcycle accident where, among other major injuries, broke his wrist and was told he would never play the guitar again. He beat the odds. After Simon's comment that he had no charisma, Kara and Victoria convinced him to let his hair down and take off his shirt and that secured their votes. Simon's objections of the audition turning into more of a project runway audition didn't deter Randy from siding with the girls, we're going to see more of Casey in Hollywood --- just how much more is the question.

16 year old high school student, Tori Kelly, was asked by Ryan if she brought a kindergarten class with her because of the number of kids that came with her. Tori brought Hope Starr into the audition with her to distribute her drawings for each of the judges, and planted herself on Posh's knee for the audition. Tori's performance of "Grab You" by John Mayer was average, I had to side with Simon on this one, "I would have put Hope through before Tori."

14 contestants were put through on the first day as the words of the day were "Welcome to Hollywood." Day two opened in the Mile High City with the crowds very confident. None more confident than Austin Paul, a self-proclaimed composer, singer and football player extraordinaire, who's list of top 100 things to do in his life included Hollywood with American Idol in the #42 spot. After his rendition of "Call to the colorblind" Victoria said he was arrogant by grabbing his pecs, Simon called him annoying, Randy didn't get it and Kara called him cocky and said they were doing him a favour by saying no. Oh dear judges, you did us all a favour there.

Kenny Everett sang next, but only sang about 4 notes that he held for 30 seconds each. He figured himself to be the male Mary J Blige and boasted that he sings as a community service to others, the judges disagreed with a nohh-ohh-oohh-woah-no! Simon said it sounded like he'd been punched and was screaming in agony. Kenny's "you gotta be kidding, I'm a great singer" response did little to change the judge's minds. Kenny also got a no from all 4 judges.

Kenny was followed by several people who were unceremoniously told no. The judges were having some laughs at the expense of some of the less talented contestants, Simon told one high pitched singer that he thought she may have just killed every cat in Denver.

Nicci Nix said she flew 14 hours from Florence Italy to get to the audition. Her speaking voice, which would be considered high and squeaky even for an animated cartoon character had Simon asking if she had "eaten any helium today". Somebody had to do it. As we all plugged one ear in anticipation, she sang Girls Aloud's "Something kind of ooooh", her voice became much lower when she sang, and after much discussion and wardrobe kudos, "Helium Girl" got her golden ticket. Something about this one tells me she might be the drama queen that keeps the ratings up until we get down to the really good talent portion.

Contestant number 15222, Haeley Vaughn, maintained a positive attitude even after watching contestant after contestant walk out of the auditions with empty hands and broken dreams. She went country with "Don't even know his last name" and nailed it. She got to bring in her sister and mom to meet Simon and the rest of the judges, they watched proudly as she received 4 yes votes, including Randy Jackson's incredibly (incredibly) annoying "one hundred million percent yes, Dawg" endorsement. Still not an original bone in the man's body after so many seasons judging this contest. Haeley Vaughn is a name we're going to hear right down to the final ... ten. That is my prediction.

The last contestant of the night, if you can call him that, was Ty Hemmerling. Obviously a joke by the producers to let him get this far, Bikini Boy" screeched a couple of notes of "Achy Breaky Heart" when the judges got up and left him standing by himself. He was left muttering to himself something about how rude they were, asked Kara to stay, asked her for a hug, and kept wondering when they were coming back. If that was a ratings booster, it bombed --- he was boring and ridiculous.

12 more tickets were given out on day two bringing the count to 26 tickets for Denver, CO. Wednesday is the last audition episode before going to Hollywood next week.